This step alone can do wonders for you almost immediately. First understand that what you focus on affects your emotional state, or how you feel.

If what you’re thinking about makes you feel bad it affects your energy level in a bad way. If you’re thinking about something that makes you feel bad you will quickly start to feel stressed or tired or just generally have a bad attitude.

On the other hand, if what you’re thinking about makes you feel good it affects your energy level in a good way. It doesn’t really matter if what you’re thinking about it is true or not what matters is if it helps you feel good.

So use this to enhance your career. For example if thinking about the weekend or free time makes you feel good then don’t wait until Friday to daydream about the weekend. But if thinking about the weekend makes you feel bad because you want it to be the weekend now or it makes you yearn for the weekend, then avoid thoughts about the weekend choosing to focus on something to make you feel good instead.

Here is another example. On a recent episode of Dancing with the Stars, Olympian Evan Lysacek was being coached by his dancing pro Anna Trebunskaya. Evan is a top notch technician but was not good at showing emotion in his dancing. Anna asked him, “What makes you happy?” Evan mumbled something about cars and then said, as his face lit up, “my baby nephew!”

He then proceeded to show cute little videos of his nephew on his phone to his coach smiling & laughing the whole time. Anna capitalized on that reaction and brought it to his attention. Long story short, he danced like a whole new man in that week’s competition. Even more importantly, he now knows a trick (shall we say, a Jedi mind trick?) for something to focus on when he notices he is not feeling as happy as he could.

Step #2 Use your strengths in your career.
Strengths as related to careers are activities that you enjoy doing, that you do well, and that you don’t mind doing repeatedly. This new hot philosophy on strengths was developed by Marcus Buckingham and Donald O. Clifton in the book, “Now, Discover Your Strengths.”
They promote the idea that we can be happier in our careers by focusing on strengths instead of trying to improve weaknesses. In fact, they say that one can advance further and faster in skill attainment by practicing and developing one’s strengths rather than one’s weaknesses (for example, their idea that you can work everyday  to improve a weaknesses and achieve only lackluster results). The book is a little long winded because of all the theory and development talk, but when you buy the book you get an assessment code to enter online to take the assessment. The more recent version is StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath. The book is much more of a friendly, quick reference which also includes an assessment.

Step #3 Be selfish.
No, I don’t mean selfish in a bad way. It is simply that factoring in everyone else’s opinion of what you should be doing in your work, (or for that matter what anyone thinks about the work you do) is exhausting and fruitless…so be selfish! After all, YOU are the one putting in the time and attention to whatever you choose for your career, and you are the one noticing everyday how you feel about your career (see step #1). So be selfish, and take charge of your career development to make sure your work is life-enhancing.

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They key to remember to is they probably don’t want to hire just anyone. They are looking for they best they can get. So, do your research and ask. If you don’t ask, you already have your answer…its no!

There is also the matter of acting with respect throughout the negotiation process as you did through the hiring process. Don’t take it personal that they will try to hire at the most advantageous pay rate for them. Of course, you will work to help understand that they get what they pay for…this is your leverage.

Remember this too: the wage you accept will impact your attitude on the job. It will either be in a positive way or a negative way. The salary you accept now determines the raises you will get later because raises are based on percentages usually.

All that being said to help you see the importance of negotiating, here are some techniques you may want to consider.

• It is important to buy time when a number is thrown out there. Pausing for just a few seconds when a number is mentioned can give the impression that they will have to come up on something so you can meet in the middle. It could be money, time, or perks that they come up with but something more. They say a number and you pause as you are considering your response. Sometimes those few seconds can make you thousands of dollars! If not now then certainly as you work for them years and each future raised is based on what you accept at the start.

• You also buy time when negotiations are closing for the day. You sum up what they are offering and say, “I will sleep on it and speak with you tomorrow if that sounds okay with you.” Or you may sum it all up and say (as long as it is true), “I expect another offer to come in soon, when is the latest I can get back to you? Can I reply by Friday, does that sound acceptable?”

• Sometimes you do have to say “no” to an offer if you feel they are just too low and it will affect your attitude and work ethic to accept. There is power in walking away if they refuse meet your needs and you feel you can get your needs met elsewhere.

• One technique to use is to say something like this, “after careful consideration, I must decline your job offer. Thank you for taking the time to talk with me and please do call if the budget changes.” That way you give them room to come up to your expectations if they are really pained to see you walk away.

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You may also want to add a space on your accomplishment log to mention how you felt while working toward each accomplishment. Say a 1 to 5 star rating, 5 being the best. This will help you recognize what activites juice you up so that you can make arrangements to do more of those.

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It is important to think of career coaching and lifelong learning as investments rather than only expenditures. Better yet, make career development a line item in your annual budget so that money spent on it is not just emergency spending but thoughtful, pre-planned spending instead which has a much better chance of long-term, positive impact.

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Answer: Don’t have any savings.

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You see, no matter what your work is each day you are in charge of your attitude. If you spend time resisting what you chose to do (i.e. working in order to feed yourself and your family) then you are spending a lot of energy resisting something you have decided to do. What a waste! Since you have decided to do it anyway, why not be fully present in the moment and engaged in your work cheerfully?

As demonstrated in the fast food workers’ story that I linked to above, it is when working while fully engaged in the present moment and with a positive attitude that you profoundly affect the people around you. Not only that, but you also greatly help your own cause. People love to be around such a positive, carefree personality so your networking becomes easy and natural. You begin to allow creativity and intuition to work through you. And, most importantly of all…you just generally become a force for Good!

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But food does need to get to the table and sometimes despite all your best preparations and intentions, you don’t know that the job you just accepted is a buster until you are in it. From there you have a few options.

• Assuming you are financially able, admit the mistake asap and get the heck out of dodge within the first few months on the job. Don’t do it more than once or you are demonstrating poor decision making skills but it is a once in a decade option if need be and it can become a “lessons learned” story.

• Follow the advice of Eckert Tolle and learn to drop the emotion, frustration, anxiety, and anger around the situation and be fully conscious and egoless in the present moment. This approach will help you stay in the job you accepted and it will help you to make a smoother transition overall when the time comes.

• Hang in at the job remembering to take care of yourself a bit more than usual on your time off. Give yourself plenty of opportunities for rejuvenating exercise and recreation. Also, give yourself permission to further explore your interests and be open and creative about possibilities for your next career move.

There is definitely something to be learned by studying those who find their success by following their bliss. I believe following your interests is so important because interests are often little taps from intuition pointing to flow experiences and other types of abundance.

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I think reading good stuff like this makes an abundance mindset more likely by helping to keep us more aware of opportunities all around us as well as our own potential based on our unique combination of personal strengths.

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How can anyone have that?

It begins with knowing it is possible, and believing you can tap into that kind of abundance. See yourself in those shoes. Imagine that others find you joyful to be around and that even complete strangers will support you in your goals. Be cognizant of when you are in a zone, when things are coming easily. These “flow” experiences are major hints that you are on the right track and they will help you identify your passion.

Most importantly, live in the present moment, the now. Sure, set goals and spend a small amount of time periodically thinking about what you want to get done and what you desire to achieve in the short and long term. But then get to work doing what can be done right now.

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